When tough times come, it is particularly important to offset them with much gentle softness. Be a pillow.
-Vera Nazarian. The Perpetual Calender of Inspiration
In my not so short, yet far from long life I have had my fair share of dealing with people and situations I am not comfortable with. Yep I have had to deal with difficult people, people I do not agree with and definitely do not agree with me. I know I know it is normal for people not to agree with each other all the time, it is how we are especially families, God knows how many times my sister’s drove me crazy….but that is different, I know she loves me I love her and in the end we will be cool with each other, right.
Not every situation is like that and we know the difficult people I am talking about, Your teacher who always looses your project, your room mate who has an issue with being clean,your boss who never gets the best out of you and yes bullies all over the world. We are surrounded by these people no matter how much we wish they relocate to Mars, they are still here and we have to deal with them without going crazy.
WE ARE DIFFERENT
It is very important we understand we are all different, we have our different views, we were brought up differently, we have different flavors of ice cream we love the most. Thing is we are different and once you realize that, you suddenly start to see things from that person’s perspective, trust me this is a good thing it saves you loads of migraine. They are not you and so may not act as normal as you want them to, it comes with the package called life.
WE CHOOSE OUR METAPHORS
We choose our metaphors, we choose how we understand certain issues or situations. So when I was little my mum will show me a glass of water. Then ask me what do you see…Thing is I saw a glass half empty, but I could have seen the glass half full too. You have to change your perspective of things. Yeah you may not like how you are being treated but just try to look at the good side. Optimism is a great tool in this war. Being happy and positive always make every situation so much better.
As much as we do not like it, these people affect our lives especially our moods. An important way to block them out is to make sure they do not get to you. Do not let their mean words or actions affect you. Do not be bullied by them. Keep your head up, you make yourself and protect that tiny little heart of yours.
CONFIDE IN SOMEONE (TRUSTWORTHY)
These times can be really hard so just find someone you can trust. Tell them how you feel, that’s what friends are for to help and encourage you. It is also important to know that gossiping or sending rude remarks does not really help these situations.
DOCUMENT YOUR FEELINGS
Dealing with these people especially bullies can just kill you. If you cannot find someone you trust enough, then document your feelings. It helps you get over things easier.
WATCH YOUR REACTION
Sometimes the best thing that moment is to scream and rip someone’s hair out but that is never the right choice, be the mature one, keep calm, that person does not deserve half of your attention, period.
Well, it is usually advisable to tell such people how you feel, but you have to be careful, sometimes it is better not to. You have to weigh your options and choose what you feel is best. If approachable then you should talk to them if not move on.
IGNORE AND RUN
With my long experience in this area, sometimes, scrap that most times it is better you avoid this person as much as possible to avoid unnecessary confrontation. Save yourself the stress and try to shape a world without such people
IT IS A MATTER OF TIME
In the end you will only be in that situation for a while, you will move on and soon forget all about that person. Don’t fret, it will be over soon. You will get over it.
Remember your life does not revolve around that person. Your life is what you make it. I understand how hard it is, just try and encourage yourself things will get better.
P.S For misfits all over the world who are bullied everyday, be encouraged, you are beautiful never make anyone make you less than who you are, and to bullies please stop, your mean words and actions affect people more than you think it does. Being mean does not make you a better person, it really does not.
Be encouraged you are beautiful and have the right to live a beautiful and comfortable life.
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